Deliverance Through the Fire

This was a true time of confusion. To add to my traffic analogy, I felt like we were lost and continually making u-turns. Time was passing; we felt a decision needed to be made; but we weren't seeing where we needed to go. I look back now and see how God was very much in control, working out the plans he had for Dennis. . .

September 20, 2010

Yesterday marked one month since we first heard that Dennis had cancer. The weeks have flown by in a blur. We have been everywhere it seems and Dennis has had to endure more exams, tests and procedures than we can keep up with. Up to this point, we haven’t really had to make any decisions; it was all about gathering information. We are now at the point where that phase is ending and it is time to act. Here is where we are at this point:

Dennis has a tumor in the lower part of the colon. His blood work showed that cancer cells are present, but his blood counts were not too far off of normal. The CT scan indicated a thickening in the area of the tumor, but no other “hotspots” were detected. The last procedure was the endoscopic ultrasound. It showed some suspicious lymph nodes above the tumor and beneath it. The doctor took a biopsy of the most abnormal looking one from above the tumor. The pathology report came back negative for cancer. The lymph nodes below the tumor cannot be tested until they are removed because of their location. This procedure also confirmed that the cancer has not spread to any other organs.

We met with the surgeon last week and he told us that Dennis would need radiation/chemotherapy treatment before surgery and likely some after. He gave us two options. The first was the “standard of care” option which included a combination of radiation and chemotherapy over a 5 week period first and then surgery. The other option was to participate in a study that would involve treatment over a longer period of time before surgery with the idea that he would need less after surgery when he was recovering. That same day Dennis went to meet with our family doctor to touch base. As our doctor looked over the reports, his initial thought was that Dennis needed surgery first and then possibly treatment after if the lymph nodes beneath the tumor turned out to be cancerous. This left us a bit confused, so we decided to go ahead and meet with the oncologist as soon as possible.

The first attempt at an appointment with the oncologist referred to us left me frustrated and not at all comfortable. Dennis called our family doctor, got another referral and an appointment was scheduled for this coming Thursday. I will tell you that a doctor’s office staff makes an important first impression. I was NOT impressed! As we began to talk together at the end of last week, we both had come to the conclusion separately that we did not want Dennis to participate in the study. We find these moments of agreement confirmation that God is leading us. It was a relief to know we had one less option to decide on. The oncologist’s opinion will help us decide the next step to take. Up to this point, the news has been very positive and Dennis has been given a very good prognosis. We continue to trust in the Lord for His provision and leading as we move into the next phase.

The kids and I had a good talk last week about Dennis’ condition and upcoming surgery as well as the need to make some personal sacrifices in order to help him recover. Josh was fascinated by the chart of the digestive system and spent quite some time studying it and the names of all the parts. He repeated back to me what the surgery would be using the correct terms and even showed Dennis when he got home. Ellie asked for prayer at school for Dennis on the day of his last procedure. She already has a sincere faith, but we are praying this faith will be deepened as we continue on this journey.

This week God has brought some awesome words of encouragement to us. I was completely blown away on Tuesday by the DVD session of my Daniel study. It was as if Beth Moore had made that segment just for us. Daniel chapter 3 is about Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego in the fiery furnace. Beth Moore used the scenario of someone finding out they have cancer to show how God can deliver us from our fiery trials. Scenario A was that He can deliver us FROM the fire in order to build our faith. Scenario B was that God will deliver us THROUGH the fire in order to refine our faith. And Scenario C was that we will be delivered by the fire into the arms of God which will perfect our faith. We believe we are in the state of being refined.
Warren Wiersbe in his Old Testament commentary wrote, “The difference between the true believer and the unbeliever isn’t the presence of faith, because everybody lives by faith in something. The difference is in the object of that faith. . . The Christian believer lives by faith in the living God and what He has revealed in His Word. . . Faith means obeying God regardless of the feeling within us, the circumstances around us, or the consequences before us. . . Our task is to obey God and trust in Him, and He will do the rest.” Isaiah 12:2 says, “Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation.” Wiersbe continued by saying, “God always rewards faith, but He doesn’t always step in and perform special miracles. Not everybody who prays is healed, but God always gives strength to bear with pain and grace to face death without fear. The three Hebrew men believed that God could deliver them, but they would trust Him even if He didn’t. That is how faith is supposed to operate in our lives.” This is how it is working in ours.

This morning we had a guest speaker at church - Larry Powers from New Hope Christian College. His message was on Psalm 107. He pointed out that in each trial, the Psalmist wrote that the people, “cried out to the Lord in their trouble, and He delivered them from their distress.” (Psalm 107:6, 13, 19, 28) We continue to call out to God, trusting that He will deliver us. And we will continue to “give thanks to the Lord for His unfailing love and His wonderful deeds for men.” (Psalm 107:8, 15, 21, 31)

In the weeks before Dennis’ diagnosis, I was developing the idea of having an eternal perspective and how this affects our lives. I finished writing out my thoughts and posted them on my blog the day after His colonoscopy. It will greatly add to the length of this update, but I am going to close with it here since it speaks of how we are able to have faith in spite of this circumstance. And this week has been all about encouraging us to continue in the faith.

Our Home Away From Home

I have been reading the book Jesus Freaks: Martyrs by dc Talk and the group Voice of the Martyrs. It has been very humbling to read about the faith of so many who have suffered great persecution and even death because of their faith in Christ. Even in the face of great physical pain to themselves and often their family - these believers stood their ground and refused to deny their Savior.

A story I read that stood out to me was about Pastor Florescu. He was imprisoned in Romania in the 1960’s. He was arrested by the Communists and tortured in the hopes that he would give the names of other believers. He continually refused to give the names of his fellow Christian brothers and sisters. Then they did the unthinkable and brought in his 14-year-old son and began to whip him. The father watched until the writer says “the poor man was half crazy. He bore it as long as he could. But when he could stand it no more, he cried to his son, ‘Alexander, I must say what they want! I can’t bear your beatings anymore!’
His son answered, “Father, don’t do me the injustice of having a traitor as a parent. Withstand! If they kill me, I will die with the words, ‘Jesus and my fatherland.’” The story continues that this angered the Communists and they killed the son right there by beating him to death.

In the midst of this tragic story what stuck in my mind was the son’s hope of his “Fatherland”. The Scripture that followed this story was from verses 14 and 16 from Hebrews chapter 11. I chose to write out verses 13-16: “They agree that they were foreigners and nomads here on earth. Obviously people who say such things are looking forward to a country they can call their own. If they had longed for the country they came from, they could have gone back. But they were looking for a better place, a heavenly homeland. That is why God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them.” (NLT)

This passage reminded me of the saying we have for places we frequent often: “It’s my home away from home.” While we often use this expression in fun, really it has a very deep truth to those who follow after Christ. This time and place we are living in now is not our true home. Our real home is eternity in heaven with our Father and Savior Jesus Christ. It is this heavenly, eternal perspective that give believers their true hope and peace. It’s what allowed the persecuted believers of long ago and of today to face death with such courage; because death will bring them into the presence of the Lord where there is no more pain or sorrow.
In first Peter 1:1, Peter began his letter by addressing it to “God’s elect, strangers in the world.” He later wrote to the believers in verse 17 that they were to, “live (their) lives as strangers here in reverent fear.” Again in chapter 2 verse 11 he spoke to the believers as “aliens and strangers in the world.”

Jesus spoke in John 15:19 saying, “If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.” In John 17:14, Jesus prayed for His disciples by stating, “I have given them your word and the world has hated them for they are not of this world any more than I am of the world.”

I really like the song “Only Temporary” by “Mercy Me. The chorus says, “There’s a reason why this world just don’t feel right. We are strangers who are simply passing by. In light of all eternity it’s only temporary”. The second verses speak of how “this place was never meant to be (our) home” that we are “standing on the outside looking in” but that we don’t “complain cause (we’re) “already on (our) way.”

I have to admit that it has taken me time to develop this “alien” perspective. In the not too distant past I found myself holding onto this world in a variety of ways - wanting to see, experience and have things to the extent of almost wishing the Lord would tarry until I could achieve them. Absurd, I know. As you would imagine, this kind of perspective does no one any earthly or heavenly good. It simply created discontent and frustration in my spirit. 

God’s word is very clear about the kinds of treasures we are to store up. In Matthew 6:19-21 Jesus told us, “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” 

What does it mean to store up heavenly treasures? Warren Wiersbe says, “it means to use all that we have for the glory of God.” He goes on to say that “wealth not only enslaves the heart, but it also enslaves the mind. (Also,) materialism can enslave the will. If God grants riches, and we use them for His glory, then riches are a blessing. But if we will to get rich, and live with that outlook, we will pay a great price for those riches.” In Hebrews chapter 11 we read of the faith of many believers from the Old Testament. This chapter tells us that Moses in particular “regarded disgrace for the sake of Christ as of greater value than the treasures of Egypt.” Timothy commands the rich in chapter 6 verses 17-19 to “put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. . . To do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life.”

So having a heavenly perspective affects how we live our life. These verses point out just a few of the outward signs of our mindset: using what we have for God’s glory and not our own selfish desires; putting our faith and hope in God instead of money, people or position; doing good deeds; and being generous with what we have (time, talent and money). By desiring to please and glorify the Lord, we will find greater contentment and satisfaction with life than if we are only looking out for our own selves.

Another positive outcome from having a heavenly outlook is how it helps us in trials and tribulations. When difficulties have arisen in life, at times it has felt overwhelming and I have begun to loose heart and become anxious. Thankfully these moments have lessened as I have begun to develop this eternal perspective.
1 Peter 1:6 says we should rejoice when we suffer grief and trials. Verse 7 gives the reason why. Peter writes, “These have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.” Romans 5:3 says that we should “also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.” And in James 1:2-4 we read that we should “consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

These verse help me see that trials serve a purpose in God’s plan for me. I will develop more of the Christ-like character traits that will bring glory to God in my life now, and praise from God when I am united with Him for eternity. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 sums it up by stating, “we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”

Mercy Me’s song “Only Temporary” also says, “Don’t let the situation get to you. This is not a hill worth dying on. Don’t let these circumstances tear your heart in two. Soon enough this chapter will be gone. What’s insurmountable today will simply one day fade away. In light of all eternity it‘s only temporary.”
I love the reminder that compared to eternity, nothing we experience here will last for any significant amount of time. Mira, a persecuted Christian in Bangladesh was quoted in 1997 as saying, “We give thanks to God that these things cannot destroy our spirit. Jesus told us that we are only here for a few days. We have eternal life and will stay with Him in heaven. He will take care of all this.”

Having an eternal perspective affects us in the here and now as well as in eternity. As we learn to set aside our selfish desires and focus on pleasing God now while we wait, we can experience hope and peace here on earth. And no matter how difficult our circumstances here on earth become, we have a great celebration to look forward to which can help get us through the tough times. How I look forward to my true home!

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